Sight

[dreaminghope]

I take out my contact lenses and instantly feel vulnerable. I'm acutely aware of my sudden lack of ability: I can't read anyone's facial expressions or see if anyone's addressing me. Like someone who thinks that everyone who's whispering must be talking about them, I am convinced that everyone is looking at me. I sit very still and try not to look in anyone's direction, lest they think I'm staring at them.

I'm never without my lenses during the day, especially not in public. Yesterday, I sat in the bright and busy optometrist's office, feeling exposed, waiting for my turn in the office.

I'll leave restaurants if I'm not sure whether I seat myself or wait to be seated. I'll leave stores without buying anything if no one's at the cash register and there's no clear indication of how to get someone there. In a bakery or deli case, I won't ask what something is or how much it costs; if I don't recognize it and it isn't labeled, I won't buy it. Alone in public, I get very peculiar about my interactions with other people.

The optometrist calls my name from across the room. By the time I grab my purse, she is already heading down the hall. I follow hesitantly, reluctant to assume that I'm supposed to follow her, but unsure what else to do. I'm relieved when she greets me; I did the right thing!

At the end of the optometrist appointment, I have a new prescription: -8.00 and -10.00, for those to whom that means anything. For those to whom that doesn't mean anything: I don't see well without lenses.

On a side note, I get asked a lot by those with good eyes what it is to see like me. So, if you would, a photo demonstration.



The right hand picture is approximately what I see without my lenses. This is what Zoey would look like to me at about two meters away.

Comments

[coyotewoman.livejournal.com]

That's about how I see everything more than 2 feet from my face. Mine's -7.75/-8.75 AND I need bifocals now. :( Unfortunately I can't wear contact lenses, so I'm superparanoid about where my glasses are at all times.

[particle-man6.livejournal.com]

I think I am about halfway to where you are, eyesight-wise. I go with glasses, because a) I freak out about putting things on my eyeballs, and b) I am absent-minded enough, I might leave them in, which I hear is really bad.

Maybe someday I will do something drastic - like laser surgery or something.

[firerainchild.livejournal.com]

I feel the same way. I do the same little strange things when I am out in public. And I hate doing anything without my contacts.

[gunthera1.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I completely understand how you feel. It has been years since I could see an EXIT sign (even if standing directly under it) wihout my glasses. I stopped carrying my prescription with me because i was so embarrassed to look at it. I haven't seen the letter E on the charts they show in the optomotrist's office (even when it is the ONLY letter on the chart) for quite some time.... One of the times I went to the doctor my mother started yelling at me that I must be lying because there was no way my vision was that bad.

It is unnerving at night when I take out my contacts or my glasses.I am glad we live in a time of corrective lenses. There is no way either one of us could survive otherwise.

*hugs*

[straw-berry-red.livejournal.com]

*hugs*
thats about the same for me when i take my glassess off. the last tiem i got my eyes checked teh pascription in my left eye only had gotten worse. had to shell out 300 dollers to get one new lense.
My dad gets a new pascription every examination. but bad eyes run in his family.

[marlo.livejournal.com]

Kitteee!

I can totally relate to the blindness.

[dormant-promise.livejournal.com]

I hate looking at people without my glasses or contacts for the very same reason. Nice photo-example, pretty accurate, it's hard to explain it to people.